Let’s empower our girls! The future belongs to women! As a mother of two teenage daughters, I am thrilled to witness the societal shifts towards promoting equality and ensuring safety. The impactful #MeToo and Time’s Up movements are shining a spotlight on harassment and discrimination, allowing girls and women to assertively embrace their femininity and strength. Cheers to progress!
But we must also consider our boys.
It is essential for boys to grow into well-rounded, healthy, and empathetic men who recognize their role in society and extend respect to everyone. Yet, many boys find themselves inundated with messages that reinforce sexism, homophobia, and violence against women, while also desensitizing their emotional expression.
Embracing Vulnerability
Many boys still face immense pressure to embody a strong, dominant persona, often hesitating to express warmer, empathetic, or sensitive qualities. Such rigid stereotypes can be detrimental, suggesting that communicating emotions, being open, or even shedding tears are signs of weakness to be shunned.
The constant demand to remain stoic can lead boys to close off their emotions. Given that much of life involves experiencing vulnerable feelings like sorrow and disappointment, boys may jeopardize their chances for emotional growth.
Consequences of Emotional Suppression
Those who suppress their emotions may experience a range of adverse effects, including stress, mental health issues, weight gain, and impaired gut health. Additionally, the social isolation resulting from emotional unavailability could elevate the risk of chronic illnesses such as cancer, diabetes, heart disease, Alzheimer’s, obesity, and depression, particularly among boys and young men of color, who are especially at risk for toxic stress and health complications.
Shaping a New Masculinity
Fortunately, we have the power to redefine cultural norms. However, the term “toxic masculinity” can be counterproductive since many believe that labeling an entire gender’s behaviors as negative only promotes shame and judgment, hindering significant change. Critically assessing masculinity without a sense of blame might pave the way for evolving attitudes, particularly among younger males.
Transformative Approaches
It is absolutely feasible to guide boys toward becoming compassionate, brave, and ethical individuals, as highlighted by Barry MacDonald, Canadian author of Boys on Target (Mentoring Press, 2010) and a specialist in mentoring young males.
MacDonald emphasizes the importance of helping boys develop skills for intimacy and connection while also embracing traditional masculine traits. He advocates that boys can achieve a balance between exhibiting their strengths and exploring deeper emotional capabilities.
Fostering Relationships
A balanced life emerges when emotional intelligence is combined with courage and resilience. Those who succeed can articulate their emotions, show empathy, collaborate, and resolve conflicts peacefully.
Encouraging boys to embrace their sensitive sides will enhance their emotional intelligence, self-awareness, and self-acceptance. They will develop the ability to connect and communicate successfully, enabling lasting relationships both personally and professionally.
Celebrating Diversity
By actively supporting our boys in adopting habits that foster their holistic development, we can pave the way for a more vibrant, healthier, and safer world. Celebrating diverse expressions of masculinity allows for the creation of compassionate, balanced communities. Cheers to that!
