By Dr. Kwabena Blankson, MD | Contributor
There comes a moment in many young men’s lives when they step into a doctor’s office, glance around the waiting area, hear crying infants, and spot young kids with runny noses. They take a seat at the brightly painted giraffe table, wait for their pediatrician, and wonder, “Why am I here?”
This experience may not apply to every young man, but it’s relatable for many of my patients, as it was for me when I was a 12-year-old still seeing my pediatrician.
Personally, I found it hard to believe that the office was meant for me. I was nearly a teenager! I didn’t want a lollipop or a cute sticker. I didn’t need my mother holding my hand during vaccinations. My voice was getting deeper, except when it wasn’t. I was starting to grow hair in new places.
The issue wasn’t with my pediatrician. Rather, developmentally, I required a different kind of healthcare setting—one that addressed my needs. A place where I could feel at ease discussing topics like girls, sexual development, or masturbation. A place where someone resonated with my interest in video games and understood my emotional ups and downs.
Many parents are unaware that during a three-year training program, pediatric residents are only required to complete ONE month focused on adolescent medicine, the specialty I practice. Just one month out of 36. While they may encounter some teenagers during their training, that single month may not be sufficient to grasp the complexities of adolescent healthcare.
I want to emphasize that adolescent boys DESERVE specialized care. They face issues that are both similar to and different from those of young women. For far too long, young men have avoided seeking healthcare—not due to a lack of health concerns but due to factors like access to care (insurance), societal expectations of toughness (“boys don’t cry”), dissatisfaction with their clinical experience, or gender dynamics. Pediatrics has a significantly higher proportion of female doctors compared to other medical specialties—57% are women. How many boys feel comfortable discussing their sexual development with a female pediatrician? Male adolescents need focused care. Having a doctor who comprehends and can guide a young man through his developmental journey is essential for his transition to adulthood.
TWEEN EARLY ADOLESCENCE (AGES 10 to 13)
Jack, at 12 years old, echoes many of my own experiences at the same age. He’s beginning to notice that his parents are not “perfect,” leading to increased confrontations with them, a reduced acceptance of their criticism, and more desire for independence. “He’s always moody,” his mother says. “She’s the moody one,” he retorts, showing that he’s learning to express himself more readily (and rudely).
Now he’s self-conscious too, with his cracking voice and gradually changing physique causing him added stress. “When am I gonna get taller?” he asks at the start of every appointment. His fixation on his height is apparent—other boys seem taller and quicker, some are his close companions. He doesn’t want to hear that genetics differ across families. He dreams of playing professional basketball but stands currently at 4’10”.
Mom quickly brings us back to primary concerns—his impulsive behavior and boundary testing. I assure her that these are normal aspects of his developmental phase. I provide her with strategies to manage his excessive gaming habits. When I ask her to step out for confidential doctor time, Jack reveals that some students are vaping in the school bathroom and that he’s considered trying it but hasn’t yet. He expresses interest in girls but has never dated. He has stumbled upon pornography at home but got caught in the act.
We talk about risky behaviors, and we wrap up the appointment positively. I inform him that, according to his sexual development stage, he can expect a growth spurt in the upcoming summer. He is thrilled!
TEEN MIDDLE ADOLESCENCE (AGES 14 to 16)
I see Jack again for his annual physical at age 15. As I promised, he grew—now standing at 5 feet 6 inches. His mother enters the room, but before she can finish a sentence, Jack interrupts, “Isn’t Dr. B my doctor, not yours?” He promptly asks her to leave, and she complies. While reviewing preventive health information, I catch him posting on Snapchat a picture of himself in my office looking bored. He notices me and quickly puts his phone away. We talk about his girlfriend and he candidly shares that they’ve discussed sex but plan to wait a while. Our conversation dives deeper into risky behaviors compared to our previous discussions. It’s a healthy dialogue. He talks with the confidence of someone invincible. I share experiences with other young men his age who believed the same thing.
Before he leaves, we address his treatment of his mother and how he interacts with his girlfriend and women in general. He comes to understand that his mother loves him and may be hurt by his words and actions. We discuss the importance of mutual respect—the same kind I show him that he should echo back to his girlfriend. I commend him for his achievements on the JV basketball team and his creative writing endeavors. He’s investing less time in video games lately, whether due to his girlfriend, sports commitments, or creativity. It’s been a good visit.
YOUNG ADULT LATE ADOLESCENCE (AGES 17 to 21)
Jack returns after his sophomore year at Texas Tech. He’s a changed person from the 12-year-old I once knew; now, he’s a young man. His mother isn’t present today. He has managed to come alone for a few years. Jack mentions that his parents are doing well and that he’s meeting his mom for lunch after our appointment. We share a laugh about how far he’s come in his relationship with her. “We had our ups and downs, but she’s a great mom,” he remarks. He’s enjoying his college experience. He’s found success in engineering and is dedicated to it. He’s secured a promising internship for the summer and plans to use his spare time to get back into shape—he’s picked up some unwanted weight, and his cholesterol is slightly elevated from the previous year. His first semester grades improved, and while being the social chair of his fraternity enhanced his leadership skills, it negatively impacted his grades. He admits to having drank more than he should have on a few occasions, but he’s not vaping or using cannabis. He ended a serious relationship during his freshman year and has had only one protected sexual encounter since then. I offer him some relationship advice, suggest a therapist in our office for his mild anxiety, and encourage him to explore a study abroad program next semester. He inquires about how long I can be his doctor, to which I reply, “Until you’re no longer a young adult. Maybe until 26?”
My role at Young Men’s Health and Wellness is an honor. Caring for young men like Jack brings me joy. I support them through critical developmental stages, ensuring they remain physically healthy, and emotionally resilient while encouraging sensitivity—this is my motivation for pursuing Adolescent Medicine. I wish there were more specialists like me in this field, but thankfully, I’m not alone—there are other male pediatricians who share my approach, like my colleague, Dr. Kevin Windisch! However, we still need more.
Because our young men truly need us.
