By up7op
“Does this spark joy?” I found myself asking.
As I held an apple spice candle, I took a whiff from the top.
The scent has likely vanished after being tucked away in the attic for 15 years, I realized. This certainly isn’t bringing me joy.
I tossed it into the overflowing trash pile.
The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up by Marie Kondo was topping the best sellers list for 86 weeks when I first came across it. That moment kick-started a month of intense decluttering throughout my home. I emptied every drawer, closet, and bin, ending up with eleven bags for donation and ten for the trash.
Though I see myself as a ‘clean freak,’ if I were to write a guide on my ‘cleaning methods,’ it would likely land in the clearance section. My three children often roll their eyes at my compulsive tidiness. While they enjoy a meal, I’m there, meticulously wiping away crumbs. Their toys, clothing, and sports gear are segregated into labeled bins. If they neglect to return their belongings to the designated spots, they’ll face my displeasure.
Initially, I was puzzled by how this book could sell so many copies on a topic as mundane as tidying. However, as I delved into it, I found myself completely absorbed. The writing was more engaging than the psychological thrillers I generally read. The more I explored its pages, the clearer the book’s essential message became – it encourages readers to evaluate their relationship with material possessions.
Kondo notes, “Putting things away creates the illusion that the clutter problem has been solved.” Despite everything I own being neatly organized or tucked into bins, I seldom discard anything. Like Kondo pointed out, I was under the false impression that I was living clutter-free.
“You will never use spare buttons,” Kondo advises.
She’s right—I have never sewn a button onto a shirt, so why was there a collection of them in my drawer? I could no longer overlook the clutter.
“If you come across an (electrical or cable) cord and question its purpose, it’s likely you’ll never use it again,” Kondo remarks.
As I glanced over my jumble of unidentified cords, it hit me that none of them had been used since I had started gathering them.
The book prompted me to reflect on how and why I acquired each item I owned. I recognized a pattern in my tendencies to hold onto things; I worried I might need them someday or felt guilty for not using them.
It was time for me to embrace step one from her book, “start by discarding, all at once, intensely and completely.”
Kondo counsels to focus on “what we want to keep, not on what we want to discard.” To achieve this, she recommends holding each item and asking, “Does this spark joy?”
At first, this question sounded absurd, but I decided to give it a shot despite my skepticism.
“If you only keep items that spark joy, you fill your life with things that bring you happiness,” Kondo explains. This reorganization of belongings can trigger a life change and shift in perspective.
For me, the greatest transformation occurred through discarding items I never used and clothing I had never worn. Kondo refers to this phenomenon as “the magic effect of tidying.”
She suggests thanking your items with thoughts like, “Thank you for teaching me what doesn’t suit me.” This simple mindset shift made it easier for me to drop my unworn red shirt, still with tags, into the donation stack.
Kondo asserts that once you finish tidying, “You can clearly see what you need in your life and what you don’t, and what you should and shouldn’t do.”
She claims this process will enhance your confidence, as it requires making decisions about what to keep. You’re also compelled to confront past choices about your possessions and ideally learn from any poor decisions.
After I completed my tidying up, I felt a profound sense of achievement. Opening a drawer to find a pen, devoid of any useless buttons, filled me with pride over my ability to eliminate superfluous belongings. I experienced a remarkable transformation as well. I stumbled upon a book I wrote in fourth grade, which my teacher had typed and created a cover for using a typewriter and cloth. It served as a nostalgic reminder of my long-standing love for writing.
Having ‘cleaned house,’ I made the decision to actively pursue freelance writing, which led to my work being published in outlets such as The New York Times, Parents Magazine, Chicken Soup for the Soul, Upworthy, Twins Magazine, Good Life Family, and various other publications.
Being a stay-at-home mom can sometimes feel lonely. Writing has offered me the opportunity to connect with others and foster relationships.
As Kondo emphasizes, I organized my space in a way that altered my life for the better.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR:
Cheryl Maguire holds a Master of Counseling Psychology degree. Her writings have appeared in The New York Times, National Geographic, Washington Post, Parents Magazine, AARP, Healthline, Your Teen Magazine, Good Life Family Magazine, and many other publications.
